Lists that find each other
When your desires overlap, the magic appears: matches ranked by intensity, with no need to ask “what about you?”.
A private space for two
The desires youhaven't told each other yet.
OurDesires is the private kink list for couples who would rather speak plainly: fantasies, boundaries, curiosities. One list each. Together, only what matches.
Free to start · No ads · No card
The private kink list for couples
Your kink list12 matches
- Soft restraints
- Strangers roleplay
- Warm oil massage
- Playing with ice
Match
Blindfold play
You · Like
Your partner · Favourite
Waiting to be explored
Lists visible only to the two of you
Match-only mode: your partner sees only what matches
Private notes on every desire
Why OurDesires
A place to say yes. And to say no.
No shame, no judgement, and nobody else watching. Everything is designed so talking about what you want feels easy, elegant and a little addictive.
Privacy, actually
Share your full list or reveal only what matches. You decide what is seen and what stays with you.
Six levels of desire
Favourite, like, fine, maybe, no and want to try. Nuance that prevents misunderstandings and makes the conversation easier.
Intimate notes
Add context to every desire: how you picture it, where the limits are, what makes you curious. Private or shared.
Territories to explore
Bondage, domination, fluids, roleplay, toys, aftercare… Nine categories and any custom desire you can imagine.
Your history
Mark what you have already explored and keep the memory of your journey. A private map of what happened.
Categories
Nine territories. None mandatory.
Start wherever you feel like. Nobody starts at the end.
And if something is missing, you write it yourselves.
Privacy
What happens in your list stays in your list.
No public feed, no profiles to browse, no ads. Just two people and a space only they can open.
- Lists visible only to the two of you
- Match-only mode: your partner sees only what matches
- Private notes on every desire
- Export or delete your data whenever you want
The private kink list for couples
How it works
From curiosity to match in four steps.
01
Create your space
A minute, an email and a name for your corner. That's it.
02
Invite your partner
One private link. When they open it, you are both inside.
03
Fill in the list
Each of you privately, at your own pace. No peeking until it's time.
04
Discover matches
What overlaps rises to the surface. What doesn't stays yours.
Questions
What everyone asks before starting.
Is it really private?
Yes. Only the two of you can see your list. There are no public profiles, no partner search and no ads. You can also show only matches, so your partner never sees the rest.
Do we have to pay?
No. The free plan includes the couple space, both lists, matches and notes. Premium adds unlimited desires, PDF export and more detail.
Can we use it if we're just starting out?
Especially if you're just starting out. The list is made for conversations that are hard to begin: it works both to explore and to set clear boundaries.
What if my partner doesn't want to share everything?
Nothing happens. Each person decides their own visibility. In match-only mode, only what you both marked is revealed, and the rest stays private.
Can I delete my account and data?
Yes, from Settings, whenever you want. Content linked to your account is removed and your partner stops seeing it immediately.
Is this a dating app?
No. OurDesires doesn't connect strangers: it's a space for one specific couple. No swiping, no strangers.